Sunday, September 30, 2007 Hard Days End...

Current mood: stressed Category: Jobs, Work, Careers Mom having those two heart attacks, really made me stop and think for a minute. We almost lost her in September. I need to slow down and think about whats truly important in my life. Been working really hard lately. Mostly catch up. Sat down and figured out how much I need to make at work to survive and enjoy life. Did two low down and dirty deals last week. Had to drop my draws at the ninth hour, which means I didnt make any money on them. Cannot afford to do business that way anymore. Kind of sour with my boss, for making me give the deals away. Board credit for him/company, nothing for me. All in the name of winning the business. And one of the customers is an asshole asshole asshole. You'll hear that echo? Since Im still sour about the deals, I will be ignoring my boss this coming week. We wont be joking around or anything else for that matter. Son of a bitch! *had to spell that one correctly* Im always on the grind. Was sitting in my cubical last week around 7pm, as the sun began to set. Always carry my camera with me. I pulled it out and went and sat on the ledge in the window. Have a great view in my office. I looked out at the areas's I cover in my territory. Buildings for miles. They seem endless. Im only one person. How can I conquer the world, if I cant even conquer some towns? *wanting to pull out hair* I have to change the way I work. Work smart and not hard. Starting to feel burnt out. I want to close the deals I want to close. Tired of closing deals to make quota. I wanna do more than make money. Yeah making money is very important. I want to create relationships with my customers that last and bring in new referrals. This all cant be in vain. Have to find the meaning of it all. Sometimes I think Im running in the same spot over and over again. Lord help me?!